Mercury, seated before a personalized tea service whilst clutching his velvet-draped scepter: "Hmmmn, hmm, hello boys. Join me in a cup of tea?"
Kansas members, replying in satin tour-jacketed unison: "Helmet laws suck motherf#*%er!"
Faintly, from a Kansas roadie in the distance: "Peavey Ruuuuules!"
Within a year or so of this gig, I read a quote (a bold pull-quote, no less) in Creem Magazine from a member of Kansas regarding the artistic integrity of the then chart topping media darling, Bruce Springsteen: "That's not talent, it's just two chords going back and forth." Suddenly, the phrase "Comparisons are odius" made complete sense. I like to think that somewhere, the narrow chest of my seventh-grade English teacher* swelled ever-so slightly against the constraint of his cable knit sweater vest. If they can't see something in it's own light, so be it; I'm not going to try and change any minds. But that didn't mean I had to give a shit about any of them.
Later that week I picked up the Ramones first Album.
*Mr. Kratzman was my seventh-grade English teacher at Gateway Middle School In Maumee, Ohio. In addition to banging his head against the wall in response to our generally knuckled-headed juvenile existence, dropping the occasional Lydgate, Cervantes and (attention pecksniffs: feel free to argue the spelling/origin of odius here, I haven't the time or concern) Shakespeare reference, he could bang out show tunes night and day on the old Gateway upright piano, often accompanied by Mrs. Uhause(sp?) on vocals. He was truly the son my mother wished for. If only the Maumee curriculum specified for a yearly visit from TRCKAK(The Rock Combo Known As Kansas), we'd all be editing the Westminster Review by now.
